Haruki Murakami's Impossible Japan →

THERE ARE NOW A CHAIN OF DOLPHIN HOTELS IN JAPAN. BRB PACKING.

So, this is terrifying footage when you consider that Occupy Wall Street has yet to invoke the same thing.

WTF Oakland.

"THIS IS WHY WE DON’T LET BRITISH PEOPLE INTO SPACE NOW."

Here’s a music video. It’s about squishy teenage feelings and sexuality.

And stuff.

Not Every Plucky Young Editorial Staffer Is The Next Roger Ebert →

Or, the New York Times does what most companies do when they need someone to cover an obscure film: get the intern or one of the copy staff who once said they once went to that arty theater—The Anthropologie? The Misogony? Regal Cinemas?—and assign them.

To great results!

I like that instead of a record scratch after John Cena asks, “how are we all gonna do a job for two years and not kill each other," it’s a car crash.

And then, private investigators! In Mexico!

God bless you, wrestlers-in-movies-production-companies.

“The feta cheese is sourced from Turkey!”

— Explanation for why a taco has to be $6.50. Who puts feta cheese on a taco anyway?

“Ever since [Name] was linked to by the Voice, she’s become such a sex symbol. And all because she had her tits out on the Internet! Everyone always asks about her.”

—

Overheard at the Spectacle Theater. Aka, “we all have smart phones now and can quietly look up naked photos of your friend before the movie starts to pass judgement on her status as a sex symbol…from two months ago."

edit: that said, not linking. the voice is filled with naked famous women. some of them not even escorts!

It gets better. 

When The Caption Writer Has Had Enough.