A List of Low Maintenance, Film-Related Halloween Costumes

  • Whip Whitaker, Flight (You’ll need: a cheap pilot outfit, cocaine, 1/3 empty liter of orange juice, three shot bottles of vodka, cigarettes, aviator glasses).
  • Freddie Quell, The Master ( You’ll need: shoddy clothing too small for you, rickets, grain alcohol, white bread, optional sailor hat).
  • Tony Mendez, Argo (You’ll need: a beard, button-up shirt, corduroy jacket, script with “Argo" on it).
  • Aaron Cross, The Bourne Legacy (You’ll need: winter jacket, boots, pants, knit cap, toy rifle and modified Altoids tin with green and blue mints OR suit sans tie, knapsack and modified altoids tin with green and blue mints. Must also constantly refer to them as “Chems" and ask if anyone has anymore “Chems" every five minutes).
  • Blacksmith, The Man with the Iron Fists (You’ll need: tank top, shorts and a lot of tinfoil).
  • Magic Mike, Magic Mike (You’ll need: a time machine set to six months ago, membership to P-90X, cane and a low-to-no carb diet with high protein).
  • Joseph Gordon Levitt, Looper, The Dark Knight Rises, Lincoln, Premium Rush (You’ll need: to be Joseph Gordon Levitt, Spats, Optional: bicycle, fixed gear).
  • James Bond (Daniel Craig version), Skyfall (You’ll need: a Heineken, suit, fixed glare as if you have the worst wedgie in the world but know it is nothing if you have to drink another Heineken, another Heineken).
  • Cloud Atlas, Cloud Atlas (You’ll need: photos of yourself from various ages and questionable fashion choices, a copy of “Cloud Atlas," a long-winded exposition about how you’re the perfect version of yourself that has arrived at this moment in time in order to accomplish a perfect moment as foreseen by a group of higher beings to make something right, a shitty tattoo of a meteor, a picture of Tom Hanks from Cloud Atlas).