My sophomore year at NYU, I was pretty in love with a girl who lived on my floor. She was competition-level gorgeous, blonde, and Southern - all weaknesses of mine when it comes to the fairer sex. I don’t want to embarass her, so we’ll call her Brittany. (Her real name - tricky, huh?)
She claimed a long distance relationship with a wide receiver at a large, southern school with, disgustingly enough, both a Division I football team and a solid academic reputation. This could have been a fabrication to ward off the inevitable advances of every boy in the dorm (I didn’t say my weaknesses were unique), but it worked. My interactions with Brittany were polite, friendly, and infrequent. There were plenty of opportunities to make a fool of myself (drunkenly, soberly, or otherwise), but I managed to avoid them.
What I’m trying to say here, Facebook, is please take one baby step back from my life. If you could at least change the algorithm so this “suggestion” feature doesn’t display the same damn person every time I log in, I would really, really appreciate. For personal reasons.
Facebook uses a high school crush of mine to remind me, “You should be friends with her!"
I thinks not, Facebook. I thinks not.