Friend 1: Ugh. What a creepy billboard.
Friend 2: Agreed. That makes me never want to buy a mattress from Leeds.
Friend 1: Look at him. He’s a grown man wearing little boy pajamas.
Friend 2: And not just little boy pajamas, but little boy pajamas from the 1930’s. I mean, who wears a hat to bed?
Friend 1: Yeah, how has that ever been comfortable?
Friend 2: And that creepy death stare.
Friend 1: If he’s asleep, why aren’t his eyes closed?!
Friend 2: He’s staring at us like a guy in a bar who wears too much leather.
Friend 1: Hey, any leather is too much leather.
Friend 2: Burn.
They high five.
Beat.
Friend 1: And he’s sleeping on the word “Leeds”. If their mattresses were really comfortable, wouldn’t he be sleeping on that?
Friend 2: Everything about him screams, “I’m an evil rape elf and I can’t wait for you to fall asleep…”
Friend 1: “On one of my mattresses because I live inside of them.”
Friend 2: Ugh. What a creepy billboard.
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Fourth time's the charm.